| wow.. |
[03.02.06 & 6:40PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sick |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Matchbook Romance - Surrender |
] |
man, it's really been forever since i have written in here. sometimes i feel i can't write as well as i used to...like the words don't flow to my fingers as easily as they have in the past. i don't know what it is, with each passing day it gets harder & harder for me to open up & share my innermost thoughts & feelings. could it possibly be because even i myself am not aware of the deepest emotions i hold in the very depths of my own soul? there is a lot about me that most people see past...or choose not to see. it's there, you just have to look for it. there are only a couple people i can truly open up to...i can count them on one hand. but i want them to know things about me, i'm sure if they tried hard enough they could reveal things about myself that even i don't know yet. it's not easy for me to open up to new people. it takes time. everything takes time. i don't even know where all of this is coming from...i don't know what i'm expecting to accomplish by writing this entry, probably nothing. i just felt it necessary to write something since i haven't in so long. alright i'm done typing. i could continue blabbing on about nonsensical nonsense. lol because that's what this entry has been. HEY atleast i updated right?
PS- I'M SICK. it sucks. lol
|
|
| THINGS I HAVE LEARNED IN THE PAST COUPLE OF MONTHS... |
[12.07.05 & 2:09AM] |
|
1) Don't take the harsh words of others to heart, it usually springs from jealousy. Just sit back & realize that obviously you have something they want & can't have. They have nothing better to do in their pathetic lives than to dwell on you. You should be flattered!
2) Don't give your trust away to just anyone. People can use their knowledge of your thoughts to their advantage.
3) **Especially women. Women are the devil.
4) What's meant to be will always find a way.
5) Keep on dreaming. No one can hold you back from your dreams, work hard & accomplish your goals, despite what people say...they don't know your abilities, they're just mad b/c they don't have a dream.
6) Laugh...a lot. It really does help.
7) Don't think so much, first of all it really does give you a headache when too many thoughts are trying to be processed all at once.
8) Don't let others affect your relationship...it's about you & your significant other, no one else. They can say what they want to say, just turn your head & walk away.
9) Music can save your life.
10) Work hard, play harder.
11) Believe in yourself, if you don't..who will?
12) Don't ever expect too much from others.
13) It's the ones you don't expect anything from that surprise you.
14) If you have something to say, SAY IT...b/c if you wait, it might be too late.
15) Don't wait around for the "right time", you'll learn that time never comes.
16) Don't make someone your top priority if they only make you an option.
17) If you want something, go for it, fight for it, & when you get it, DON'T LET IT GO.
18) It's all about the simple things.
19) Life doesn't always go according to your plan, so don't plan, just live.
20) Be yourself. If someone doesn't like you for who you are then they aren't worth your time. Tell them to fuck off :-D
|
|
| long time no write. |
[10.26.05 & 4:12PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 perfect<3 |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Daphne loves Derby - Simple, starving to be safe |
] |
well i haven't written in here in FOREVER. i remember when LJ used to be my passion. i would let everything out, tell everyone every little detail about my day. i have been a little more secluded these past few months, & in the last couple of weeks i have just been too damn busy. well as most of you know, kc & i are finally back together. i don't know why we waited this long...but everything happens for a reason. i guess we just realized that we're meant to be together. i love him to death. this time around it's different, we're more committed...it seems like it anyway. after all we have been through it was kind of like a little learning process. we're taking things day by day now & i love him with everything in me & i know i can never feel this way about anyone else...no matter what happens he always has my heart.
anyway! on another topic..i'm taking a few classes at lscc. can i just tell you that A&P sucks!!! never take it..well unless you have to, i hate ASHLEY b/c i'm taking it with her. she wants to be a nurse...i want nothing to do with sick people lol but oh well. i'm failing that damn class so bad. i suck. oh well i'm doing amazing in the topics that i'm good at, English & Psychology. my teacher loves my essays...she likes my creative titles lol but anyway things were pretty stressful for awhile...dealing with school, & trying to move on from KC which turned out unsucessful & i'm glad it did b/c i wasn't supposed to move on in the first place, in his arms is where i belong, dealing with friends talking shit what's new.. it was hard but it seems like everything is pretty much coming together now. i'm happier than i have been in awhile. oh yeah & this cold front is amazing...i swear there's something in the air at times like this because i get in the best moods ever!!! lol well comment guys i miss you all! :[
|
|
| yep. |
[09.14.05 & 1:34AM] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Avril Lavigne - Tomorrow |
] |
| The Keys to Your Heart | 
You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.
In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.
You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.
Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage something you've always wanted... though you haven't really thought about it.
In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily. |
|
|
| ODE TO YOU: |
[08.24.05 & 1:35AM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Mazzy Star - Fade Into You |
] |
ODE TO YOU:
This feeling is unfamiliar. It's strange, yet a mystery how i can pinpoint it exactly, without ever having any recollection of possessing it. I know what it is, I can feel it, but i can't explain it. No matter how hard I try, I will never fully understand the capacity & magnitude of such an amazing feeling. I'm sure by now you all have guessed what I am describing. It can be described as the most invigorating experience you will ever know in your lifetime, it can also be described as the most distressing heartache you can encounter. Love is a magical thing. Some people believe that love just happens. Sure, I agree to an extent. But really, what is love? The dictionary describes it as, "A deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person, such as that arising from kinship, recognition of attractive qualities, or a sense of underlying oneness." So let's elaborate on that shall we? It's a feeling of affection - which has to be shown in order to maintain a good relationship. Now what's this "underlying oneness" part about? When you are in love, do you feel your soul become one with your partner? How is that possible? Is it some sort of outer body experience? What is a soulmate? People have so many different responses to that question. Most believe it's when you find your significant other...the one person you are destined to be with all your life. But isn't it also true that when you become close with someone, anyone, whether it be a friend, a significant other, a family member, you start to develop simliar traits, similar ways of thinking, & in turn start to believe that the two of you share some cosmic connection... when in reality it's only natural that you start to coincide in that way? So many questions arise when it comes to love & compainionship. How do you know what's real? Some people say oh i have been in love before, but it didn't work out. HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? When you love someone, shouldn't it last forever? Why move on, why settle for less than what you truly believe you need to survive. That's what love is isn't it? You honestly believe that you can't survive without the person that makes your heart skip a beat. Your whole life gets thrown off track. How can you say you're in love with someone yet not do anything & everything in your power to make that love be known...or to make that love blossom & grow? How can you distinguish the difference between love & lust? It's a cosmic mystery that I honestly don't think there is a correct answer to. Everyone has their own opinions on this, I guess I am just trying to sort my thoughts out, because I am confused on this whole topic. More than anything I just want love & to be loved in return. No questions, no apprehensions, nothing. I just want to know if it's real, if it's out there. Am I really feeling this? Or am I just fooling myself into believing something that I only WISH I had, so I'm trying everything in my power to make it real...or is THAT what love really is?
Any & all comments on this would be greatly appreciated. This is what happens when it's 2AM & i have been laying in my bed thinking for the past 2 hours.
|
|
| time to actually write? |
[08.09.05 & 2:20AM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Breaking Benjamin - Rain |
] |
have you ever wanted something so bad & it seems that nothing could stand in the way...it's almost like you're on a long trip to somewhere, somewhere you've been wanting to go all your life, you've planned this moment, you've prepared for this moment, every turn, every minute of it...you get THISCLOSE to getting there, but there's an exceptionally LARGE roadblock. what to do now you ask yourself? you sit back, you think about the roads you've traveled, how long it took to get to where you are, you sit there & think, about the things you've seen along the way, the things you've learned on this trip. there's no way you're going to get this far & just give up...no way in hell...so what do you do? everyone is telling you that you should turn around, give up, go back home, your car CANNOT go any further. should you listen to the words of everyone else or follow your heart, your dreams... everything you've wanted is right there in front of you. so you sit & wait it out for awhile...the day gets hotter, the sweat drips down your face, & you realize, why the HELL am i waiting? i know what i want, i know where i want to be...so you know what you do? you get out of that car, & you run. you run to where you want to go because you KNOW it's where you've needed to be all your life. don't let everything you've ever wanted just slip right through your fingers. don't listen to others, listen to yourself, dig deep inside your heart, it's hard but you can get past that roadblock & overcome it.
despite popular belief, the most amazing things in life don't come easily. you've got to fight for them, work for them, achieve them. the best things in life aren't free..but when you find it, don't let it go..you'll regret it. if something truly makes you happy...why do you want to throw it away? human nature? why do you always want something you can't have? is that just the way it is? should we accept that fact & move on? move on & hope for something better, but knowing in your heart that nothing better will ever come? nothing could EVER compare. you felt something, there was more...you KNOW it..so why are you giving up....
Take a photograph,
It'll be the last,
Not a dollar or a crowd could ever keep me here,
I don't have a past
I just have a chance,
Not a family or honest plea remains to say,
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Is it you I want,
Or just the notion
Of a heart to wrap around so I can find my way around
Safe to say from here,
Your getting closer now,
We are never sad cause we are not allowed to be
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
To lie here under you,
Is all that I could ever do,
To lie here under you is all,
To lie here under you is all that i could ever do,
To lie here under you is all,
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun,
All the world is waiting for the sun,
All the world is waiting for the sun.
|
|
| OKAY BREAKING NEWS!! |
[07.28.05 & 10:38PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 chipper |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Acceptance - So Contagious |
] |
MICHELLE SULLIVAN HAS BEEN RAPED.
BY AN ANT.
|
|
| new york. |
[07.16.05 & 10:53AM] |
|
well guys i'll be in NY for a week! i'll update when i get back. thanks to those of you that made an effort to see me before i left...& fuck you guys who didn't. peace out bitches, see you when i see you.
|
|
| ... |
[07.15.05 & 2:38AM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 confused |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Staind - Right Here |
] |
I know I've been mistaken
But just give me a break and see the changes that I've made
I've got some imperfections
But how can you collect them all and throw them in my face
But you always find a way to keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if you chose to walk away I'd still be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep you right here waiting
I hope you're not intending
To be so condescending it's as much as i can take
and you're so independent
you just refuse to bend so I keep bending till I break
But you always find a way to keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if you chose to walk away I'd still be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep you right here waiting
I've made a commitment
I'm willing to bleed for you
I needed fulfillment
I found what I need in you
Why can't you just forgive me
I don't want to relive all the mistakes I've made along the way
But I always find a way to keep you right here waiting
I always find the words to say to keep you right here waiting
But you always find a way
To keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if I chose to walk away would you be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep me right here waiting
|
|
| horoscope...extremely scary. |
[07.03.05 & 5:13PM] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Incomplete - Backstreet Boys |
] |
JULY 2ND 2005
Your loved ones don't ordinarily expect you to say or do highly erratic things. You tend to put their feelings right at the top of your priority list, and you never do anything that will hurt them or make them feel unimportant. Right about now, however, the universe will toss something in your direction that will be too good to refuse, even if it means acting totally out of character. Go for it. When was the last time you allowed yourself to be totally impetuous?
JULY 3RD 2005
Whatever isn't supposed to happen now is exactly what you can expect to happen. The good news is that these types of circumstances free us up to react naturally, without a single passing thought of how we're supposed to act. That's something we're not ordinarily allowed the luxury of enjoying once we become adults, but it's like a vitamin B shot for our spirits. So when your own particular surprise arrives, don't think. React. And have a good giggle!
JULY 4TH 2005
More often than not, emotional situations don't work out the way they should -- like they do in the movies, that is -- but now, thanks to something that happened recently under highly unusual circumstances, a magical ending could actually be on the agenda. Your job is to refuse to make a soap opera out of anything that could ruin that happy ending -- anything you might be tempted to get involved with that isn't worth the effort. Do your part. Dreams do come true....
well damn....
|
|
| sharing some songs. |
[06.27.05 & 2:41AM] |
chris carrabba is my inspiration when i write songs like these.
the enemy that lies beneath
beneath the surface dwells,
a demon i try to hide,
under the scars i show,
under the myriad of lies.
isolate yourself, worthless enemy.
i'm not ready to let you breathe.
suffocate & die.
a bomb ready to go off,
disarmed by my shell.
the outer being that envelopes you.
i win, you can't break free.
subordinate & self indulgent.
masquerading as someone else.
you're dead to me now,
i won't bring you back.
malicious & repulsive,
the world wasn't ready for your face.
unfinished...
search deep inside yourself
beneath the superficial shell
for something deeper than the fear itself
buried deep inside of you
is something you're afraid to lose
but also scared of letting it be known.
in between the quiet noise
the silent screams, the obvious choice
is something you're afraid to let out
behind the misdirected path
is another undiscovered map
to use at your discretion
maybe luck is on your side tonight.
maybe luck is on your side tonight.
|
|
| just something i wrote. |
[06.22.05 & 5:55PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
My World - 3 Doors Down |
] |
let's take a drive tonight...
no destination, no boundaries, no rules,
just you & me.
let's not tell a soul that we're leaving,
let's just leave,
& don't turn around until we've had our moments...
moments to remember for a lifetime.
laying next to you on a beach with our toes in the sand,
watching the sun go down & rise again,
waking up in your arms every morning,
it's the best feeling in the world.
how could it get any better than this?
we'll talk the whole time,
about you & me,
about our past, our future, our family, our friends, the good times, the bad times..
we'll laugh, we'll cry, we'll share glances & moments
when no words are needed to express the love we feel for each other.
just stay together & let me feel your heartbeat,
our breaths become one & our fingers intertwine.
we fit so perfectly together..
it's moments like these that make me cherish life & how sweet it is.
i don't want this to end, it's the best feeling in the world,
just you & me, lets stay here forever...don't let me go.
|
|
| it's time. |
[06.21.05 & 2:30AM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
thoughtful |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Here by me - 3 doors down |
] |
do you guys think it's time i write an introspective entry? i do. alright, i have been thinking WAY too much lately. i guess everytime i say i'm gonna just try to live for today & not worry about anything..i'm fooling myself along with everyone else. i'm the type of person that worries constantly, i'm always paranoid & yes i am insecure. jesus, lately it's been overwhelming. but i honestly don't know why. i have so much on my plate right now, i just don't talk about it. i never do. unless you pry it out of me. i'm happy, but i can never allow myself to be too happy, i always think everything is too good to be true. i don't know how to change that feeling. i still have to decide about new york, & the time is coming closer & closer. i keep saying, we'll see when the time comes, but really...its a HUGE decision. i have to think about the things i'm going to leave behind. i have no motivation here, in NY i actually will WANT to do what i'm going there for. there's a lot more to the story i haven't told anyone. but i guess once again, i'm gonna wait it out a bit longer & see. i kind of wish i could open up more, but i'm not the ONLY one that doesn't open up. the one person that i want to open up to me, hasn't been lately. we're both going through a lot of shit right now...it's the ups & downs of a relationship i suppose. we see each other everyday & i still haven't gotten sick of him, there's a BIG plus in my book lol he hasn't gotten sick of me either...another plus. we're both the same when it comes to that factor. we get bored really easily...but really every day that we don't see each other(which is not very often), we get mad b/c we didn't lol alright enough of my ramblings. i drank tonight, maybe that's why i'm feeling a little introspective. lately when i drink certain things i get sad...well maybe not SAD but i start to think a lot about random things & my mind races. i have been drinking every night. WAY too much, shit which reminds me, we need to pay dalton back for the bottle of parrot bay tomorrow. shit...he rocks though! lol i love small towns. alright i'm done..........for now.
I hope you’re doing fine out there without me
‘Cause I’m not doing so good without you
The things I thought you’d never know about me
Were the things I guess you always understood
So how could I have been so blind for all these years?
Guess I only see the truth through all this fear,
And living without you…
And everything I had in this world
And all that I’ll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,
Right here by me.
I can’t take another day without you
‘Cause baby, I could never make it on my own
I’ve been waiting so long, just to hold you
And be back in your arms where I belong
Sorry I can’t always find the words to say
But everything I’ve ever know gets swept away
Inside of your love…
And everything I had in this world
And all that I’ll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,
Right here by me.
As the days grow long I see
That time is standing still for me
When you’re not here
Sorry I can’t always find the words to say
Everything I’ve ever known gets swept away
Inside of your love
And everything I had in this world
And all that I’ll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,
Right here by me.
And everything I had in this world
And all that I’ll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,
Right here by me.
|
|
| WOOT!! |
[06.18.05 & 2:26PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 mischievous |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
We belong together - Mariah Carey |
] |
okay so here's the deal, if anyone happened to find a PEACE CONE in their driveway, you are the chosen ones.. consider yourself lucky..ashley & i have officially become undercover agents. we had a few missions last night, they were a little difficult, we did run into some minor complications but we succeded for the most part. let's see we umm punched off a blinky thingy off of a barricade.. it is now hidden in my purse.. lol then we went for mission number 2 but we werent quite as successful.. i begged ashley to abort the mission because the cops were coming but she refused to falter. she's a determined son of a loserface.. so i said just take the whole thing.. so we shoved the huge barricade in the back seat of her MOMS buick and ran over the curb trying to flee! & once again we WERE succesful.. well until we got to chickfila and ashley thought it would be smart to park under a light.. you know so we could see DUH.. but then we realized as we were trying to remove the blinky thing that we were RIGHT under a light.. BAD idea.. DUH.. then we took some pictures.. then got rid of the evidence.. then we went to 7-11 for ice cream for all our hard work :) ... i lost my bracelet so there is a clue out there somewhere.. oh well we didnt cause too much damage. we just rearranged the barricades a little.. from the school to chickfila, its all the same.. LOL but anyway back to the cones.. several of you have recieved a peace cone in your driveway.. or on your car.. consider this a good sign it means we COME IN PEACE.. congratulations.. under cover agents 001 and 002 will not be after you. UNTIL you give us further reasoning.. Till then PEACE OUT BITCHES!! <3<3<3 lovelovelove
lol we're officially retarded.
|
|
| O HAPPY DAY :] |
[06.17.05 & 12:42PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
giggly |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
3 doors down - Here by me |
] |
I JUST WOKE UP IN THE BEST MOOD EVER! @%$#%^# IS THAT NORMAL? i'm like bouncing off the walls! lol ANYWAY!! what's been going on?? oh yes we had a kick ass party at charla's on wednesday night & yesterday we went to this chick's volleyball game & then to hooters then just hung out. now today i have woken up in the best mood ever & i can't wait to do something! i apologize to those of you who i was bitchy to yesterday...i was frustrated with a lot of things. but i got over it, i always do. tonight we're having either a pool party at derek's or a bonfire party for joey's b'day! he better bring my canolis...hm i think i'll call him to remind him now. OH i also found out the exact date we're leaving for NY, we're leaving on the 16th of July. i talked to my grandmother the other day, she sounds so weak but still like grandma. she's such a strong woman. she really wants me to stay atleast til december, but i really don't know...i don't want to. but then again, i do have responsibilities to my family too...i need to have a serious talk with a few people. BUT I DON'T WANNA THINK ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW SO MOVING ON. you know what cd is really good that you guys should get? the new 3 doors down cd. it's amazing <3 k that's all. call me up if you guys wanna PARTAYYY! <3<3
|
|
| i am in love. |
[06.13.05 & 11:41PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
touched |
] |
i'm in love...that's really all i have to say.
i love this song.
And I’d give up forever to touch you
’cause I know that you feel me somehow
You’re the closest to heaven that i’ll
Ever be
And I don’t want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
’cause sooner or later it’s over
I just don’t want to miss you tonight
And I don’t want the world to see me
’cause I don’t think that they’d
Understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can’t fight the tears that ain’t
Coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you’re alive
And I don’t want the world to see me
’cause I don’t think that they’d
Understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don’t want the world to see me
’cause I don’t think that they’d
Understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don’t want the world to see me
’cause I don’t think that they’d
Understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
|
|
| bored bored bored! |
[06.13.05 & 1:23PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 bored |
] |
omfg i swear. no wonder i don't work here full time like they want me to. this is THE most boring job ever. i'm so tired too. i couldn't fall asleep last night. well i was falling asleep when kc was over, i was so comfortable laying in his arms...then when he left i definitely had trouble falling asleep..is that weird?? we saw mr & mrs smith last night, that was a good movie. i love both brad pitt & angelina jolie so any movie with them is good to me. i barely got any sleep last night, i woke up at 5:30 this morning.. i wanna go home & pass out but i think i'm going with some people to Olive Garden for Deo's birthday. that should be fun i could go for some italian food tonight. but idk...OO brown eyed girl is playing in the background...reminds me of my michelle...who i seriously haven't actually hung out with in awhile. makes me kinda mad considering she's my best friend. i know i'm always with kc but she's always with nikki or farrah lately. but whatever no biggie i guess..even though soon i'll be going to NY for a week then when i get back she'll be leaving to go back up to tally. she hasn't partied much with us lately either...which is odd. i have come to the final conclusion that i could quite possibly become a raging alcoholic sometime in the near future lol i'm already a drunk..gimme 10 more years i will probably see some of you fuckers at AA. oh well it happens! blah alright i guess i'm done blabbing for now!! later kiddos.
|
|
| last night's events. |
[06.12.05 & 1:59AM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 tired |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Jimmy Eat World - Kill |
] |
so last night turned out pretty well...despite the drama that occured, a lot of crying & yelling. but then again...when is there NOT drama? i just realized i haven't really been typing in here as much as i used to, i just never have time anymore. i'm never home. my mom has been on my case about that...i'm seriously always out. i can't stand sitting in a house though so whatever. i'm trying to think back on everything that's been happening lately but i really for the life of me can't. i do remember sneaking in to see the end of the longest yard a little drunk at some point then seeing it again later last week, the whole thing that time lol that was an awesome movie..you guys should check it out if you haven't already. i worked yesterday & it was one of the longest days ever. thursday night we went to derek's & had another bonfire. i got bitten up like crazy again. but it was fun, i was pretty drunk then i most definitely had to go home & talk to my mom lol me & ashley were supposed to both go to my job but my dad didn't think it'd be a good idea for her to go sooo she stayed at my house all day then mike went to my house to pick her up & they came to my work to bring me some food then they waited with me til i got off of work..i got off at like 3:45 then we headed back to my house, then somehow a bunch of people ended up chillin at my house for a bit..it was me, kc, mike, ashley, desirae, emilie & dick..we all sat around my dining room table playing scattegories before we headed out to american pie to meet up with everyone. seriously we had a line of like 12 cars. i can't even begin to tell you who all was there...but it was a lot of freakin people. we then headed out to derek's pool. things were going great..then some drama with someone happened & everyone got all bent outta shape. teddy bear derek told me that it was probably the last time he was gonna have a party at his pool in awhile..but i told him that everything would be fine just that maybe we should stick with inviting the people we know won't cause problems..b/c every other time we have had a party there, everything was great. anyway after that, me, kc, mike, ashley & cory went to tavares to kc's house & it was definitely daylight before we knew it. cory passed the fuck out on the chair with a beer in his hand lol kc & i went to sleep at like 7:30 & mike & ashley stayed up for a bit, mike was still drinking at like 9 in the morning lol today was pretty much just a bummy day..we woke up around 3 something. if anyone saw me today...i do apologize for my appearance..i looked horrible, i didn't take a shower until like 10 something tonight when we got back to kc's. then me, kc, mike, derek, charla & cory just hung out for a bit & watched bumfights & another movie. now i'm home & about to go to sleep. i have to wake up early tomorrow b/c my mom & i are getting my dad from the airport. this week went by really fast. oh & an update on my grandmother..my dad says she's doing A LOT better, so thanks to those of you who kept her in your prayers. alright well i'm gonna go to bed now, nighty night:-D
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| so very true.. |
[06.10.05 & 10:02AM] |
When a GIRL is quiet,
Millions of things are running in her mind.
When a girl looks down,
It means shes uncomfortable.
When a GIRL is not arguing,
She is thinking deeply.
When a GIRL looks at you with eyes full of questions,
She is wondering how long you will be around.
When a GIRL answers "I'm fine" after a few seconds,
She is not at all fine.
When a GIRL stares at you,
She is wondering why you are lying.
When a GIRL gives you her number saying call me sometime,
she means she wishes for a call when she gets home.
When a GIRL calls you everyday,
She is seeking for your attention.
When a GIRL wants to see you everyday,
She wants to be pampered.
When a GIRL says "I love you",She means it.
When a GIRL says that she can't live without you,
She has made up her mind that you are her future.
When a GIRL says "I miss you",
No one in this world can miss you more than that
When a GIRL is jealous about other people seeing you more than she does,
its because she loves you and misses you so much!!
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| TAG~ |
[06.06.05 & 11:22AM] |
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mood |
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 flirty |
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Rules: Things you enjoy, even when no one around you wants to go out and play. What lowers your stress/blood pressure/anxiety level? Make a list, post it to your journal... and then tag 5 friends and ask them to post it to theirs.
-Music - MUSIC IS MY LIFE<3<3 you know how some songs either take you back to a certain place in time? or just when you hear a song, it kind of takes you away & you feel like no one can reach you.
-Singing - Ofcourse we all know this one for me, it definitely helps me let out my stress.
-Dancing - Another great way to let go of stress, just dance your heart out, like no one's watching.
-Writing - Whether it's writing songs, poetry or just ltle stories, i can really let my emotions out through my words.
-Taking a bath - Something about taking a nice warm bubble bath just makes you feel good.
-Being with people i love - They seem to let me realize that there's always something to look forward to even when all hope seems lost.
Shopping - Spending money? Getting new things? Enough said!
-Being out doing something - Gotta keep your mind off things, if you sit in a house too long, you start to go mad. lol well i do anyway!
TAG VICTIMS...
i know some of you won't do this but oh well...
MICHELLE, KC, JOEY, STEFF, KRISTINA, LINDSAY
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| today.. |
[04.06.05 & 9:47PM] |
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sleepy |
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music |
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Jet - Are you gonna be my girl |
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wow i have come to a conclusion that i don't want children lol. babysitting is not as easy as most of you think, especially with a 2 month old! older kids are fine, but i'm always so freaking worried about this newborn. jesus...he's always crying!!! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh & this was just my first day. lol i'm gonna go nuts. especially waking up at like 5am. uggg i just hope i get used to it soon. you guys might be seeing less & less of me...*sigh* oh well you'll all get over it, it doesn't matter much anywho! hmmm sean's birthday is saturday, idk what to get him. anyone have any ideas? well i have something in mind, he mentioned it & it's a pretty practical gift...makes sense. idk how i'm gonna swing the partying this weekend, i know for a fact my mom is gonna think it's irresponsible of me to go out & stay somewhere when i have to work in the morning. i hope you all have fun *tear* i'll work somethin out! i'm in a surpringly good mood considering my ears are throbbing from listening to a baby screaming all day =D BY THE WAY ALL YOU GUYS READ MICHELLES JOURNAL & KEEP A NOTE OF SOME OF THOSE THINGS ON THAT LIST...SHOW US YOU LOVE US <3
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| friends only =] |
[03.30.05 & 2:37PM] |
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just letting everyone know that you have to be my friend to read my journal. so if you'd really like to know what's going on in this brain, friend me & i'll friend ya back <3 LAUREN
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inter_rupti0n's journal
